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Fondants C
Otherwise, Vanessa.
18, and learning to be it
Mail Me: creamsfondants-@hotmail.com
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Words from Before It's Too Late by Goo Goo Dolls.
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Tuesday, May 27
I'm So Lazy to Blog Lately. Whatever Happened to Pretty Sentences and Lovely Emotions?
IGNORE EVERYTHING BELOW. I'M GOING TO ANNOUNCE A SECRET!
I LOVE MY MEIMEI YAP HUISAN!
Life is always good to me(:
It kinda sucks, when you don't get second chances to make first impressions.
Take a step back and look at me now would you? Just right now.
[edit]
Stealing the crown form the original AJ Guitar Queen!
TJ Guitar Queen wannabe (before anyone makes a dig at me, I make fun of myself first)
HUISAN! FOR YOU TO KOP AND PUT ON YOUR BLOG SO YOUR LOVELY BLG WILL HAVE MY FACE AGAIN. And you can hack my facebook, rather, please hack my facebook!
Our very cute identity! And the designer! Very happy that we were done quite quickly, Kelmen's a pretty good artist. Flag is gor.g.e.o.u.s.
I'd realised I haven't blogged nicely with all my pretty sentences and insightful quotes for a very long time (not that anyone finds my quotes insightful or that anyone bothers to check my blog oh-so-often) How do I desrcibe this feeling that I have now? Angst? Disheartened? Utterly confused. I should probably listen to the people who know me best. But my heart is screaming in disagreement, with much agony may I add. Where has my little little childlike faith gone to? Slowly faded into the background because time and time again, reality beats it down so brutally. I hate myself now. Honestly. I'd really love to just be me, have fun and all. But fear, never leaves me alone for a second. My mind races so badly, I always end up waking 1 hour earlier and failing to sleep again. People won't like me for me. And it kills me to evaluate every word I say, everything I do. Then reading other's expression thinking: Where have I gone wrong again?
I don't think talking about my insecurities is a sign of weakness. This is plain honesty for you. Right in your face. Am I too honest for my own good? You should appreciate it, in this world of hypocrites, hiding knives behind their backs.
It doesn't matter that much to me initially. Now, that pressure is weighing me down.
I see more regrets sprouting out in my already overgrown garden!
I would love to say, heck all these, go on being yourself.
And I would.
Sooner or later now that it's all out.
I LOVE MY MEIMEI YAP HUISAN!
Life is always good to me(:
It kinda sucks, when you don't get second chances to make first impressions.
Take a step back and look at me now would you? Just right now.
[edit]
Stealing the crown form the original AJ Guitar Queen!
TJ Guitar Queen wannabe (before anyone makes a dig at me, I make fun of myself first)
HUISAN! FOR YOU TO KOP AND PUT ON YOUR BLOG SO YOUR LOVELY BLG WILL HAVE MY FACE AGAIN. And you can hack my facebook, rather, please hack my facebook!
Our very cute identity! And the designer! Very happy that we were done quite quickly, Kelmen's a pretty good artist. Flag is gor.g.e.o.u.s.
I'd realised I haven't blogged nicely with all my pretty sentences and insightful quotes for a very long time (not that anyone finds my quotes insightful or that anyone bothers to check my blog oh-so-often) How do I desrcibe this feeling that I have now? Angst? Disheartened? Utterly confused. I should probably listen to the people who know me best. But my heart is screaming in disagreement, with much agony may I add. Where has my little little childlike faith gone to? Slowly faded into the background because time and time again, reality beats it down so brutally. I hate myself now. Honestly. I'd really love to just be me, have fun and all. But fear, never leaves me alone for a second. My mind races so badly, I always end up waking 1 hour earlier and failing to sleep again. People won't like me for me. And it kills me to evaluate every word I say, everything I do. Then reading other's expression thinking: Where have I gone wrong again?
I don't think talking about my insecurities is a sign of weakness. This is plain honesty for you. Right in your face. Am I too honest for my own good? You should appreciate it, in this world of hypocrites, hiding knives behind their backs.
It doesn't matter that much to me initially. Now, that pressure is weighing me down.
I see more regrets sprouting out in my already overgrown garden!
I would love to say, heck all these, go on being yourself.
And I would.
Sooner or later now that it's all out.
Saturday, May 24
This has been a hell-lot of a busy week!
Sum things up: Class dinner at Simpang Bedok/Made of Honour; Mardi Gras (Screwed up!);GPP has been approved; Mr J's last day; And hustings coming right up!
Bright, breezy and quiet.
Aunty Geraldine!
LeXuan!
This is so cute! Taken by yours truly!
Can't falling in love was a flop. We rushed, I missed 3 notes, tempo was off, solo was bad.
Super stressed before the performance ("I'm going to screw up") and I did but it wasn't that bad afterall. It was fun but so exhausting!
Sum things up: Class dinner at Simpang Bedok/Made of Honour; Mardi Gras (Screwed up!);GPP has been approved; Mr J's last day; And hustings coming right up!
Bright, breezy and quiet.
Aunty Geraldine!
LeXuan!
This is so cute! Taken by yours truly!
Can't falling in love was a flop. We rushed, I missed 3 notes, tempo was off, solo was bad.
Super stressed before the performance ("I'm going to screw up") and I did but it wasn't that bad afterall. It was fun but so exhausting!
Thursday, May 22
I always, always, always, prove teachers like you, who look down me, wrong. Very wrong.
Try picking on me some more!
Monday, May 19
This is a cool watermelon!
Tomorrow is happily a holiday due to college day...
...But guess what? There's lessons from 12.30pm all the way till 4pm.
And still I gladly "demanded" a Tuesday practice for guitar which is at 7.30am
That's like a normal school day... and longer! Rah.
But I still feel excited about guitar practice.
WHY SO CHEAP YOU?
Let's hope that it'd be a fufilling dayyyyyyyyyy.
Friday, May 16
Here are some photos long ago!
Hi Daphne!
Hi Daphne!
Sunday, May 4
HELLO! I'M GOING TO BITCH
I don't care if this ends up really bitchy (don't worry, its nothing compared to you)
SO WHAT IF I DIDN'T GET INTO VJ FOR JAE?
( And just for the sake of it, I could jolly well have stayed on in ARTS but I thought taking Chemistry was a better chioce for me)
At least I got to experience what it was like for 6weeks. And I'm very happy in my current college as well. You didn't even get to breathe the air in there. The closest you ever got was Crashing my current TOP5 college. (And probably bitching about it after you couldn't even go close ebough to get rejected) If you'll be pissed off after chancing upon this post, so be it, that kinda meets my purpose.
Think again, you prolly studied twice as hard as me and well, you're not even close enough. Stop trying to compare yourself to others, you always lose anyway. And then yo go on to put that person down. Boosting your ego?
Try harder.
SO WHAT IF I DIDN'T GET INTO VJ FOR JAE?
( And just for the sake of it, I could jolly well have stayed on in ARTS but I thought taking Chemistry was a better chioce for me)
At least I got to experience what it was like for 6weeks. And I'm very happy in my current college as well. You didn't even get to breathe the air in there. The closest you ever got was Crashing my current TOP5 college. (And probably bitching about it after you couldn't even go close ebough to get rejected) If you'll be pissed off after chancing upon this post, so be it, that kinda meets my purpose.
Think again, you prolly studied twice as hard as me and well, you're not even close enough. Stop trying to compare yourself to others, you always lose anyway. And then yo go on to put that person down. Boosting your ego?
Try harder.
Friday, May 2
Time For A Sensual Post, i.e. An Emo Post
I have always felt that 2007 was a years of regrets. A year of regrets which I would want to revisit and correct.
One of the biggest sigh let out last year (followed by buckets of tears) was probably SYF. Maybe we were complacent, thought that Gold was within our reach. Suddenly, I've arrived, rather late, at a new revelation. Too silly to play blame games now and find fault with anything possible. We were probably ill-disciplined. We probably didn't have excellent leadership. We probably had the wrong attitudes. At the end of the day, each SYF proved to be a significant part of my life, where I see growth. Not only in others but myself mainly. (Who could actually make the best tempered guy chase her out of practice?) I don't fancy the way I always have to experience something in this seriousness to learn.
Sorry Moon!
I was childish, I was stubborn. So full of myself just because of one successful SYF. Still, I went on to disappoint my conductor with every single guitar practice I skipped in VJ.
All these are etched in my heart as regrets, no doubt. Ones I previously wanted very much to undo. But then again, I appreciate every single on of these regrets. Because of it, I want to achieve more. What has really touched me the most was the friendships I'd forged in each ensemble I've played it. 05 Syf with fond memories and spirit that I never let go off. 07 with tears of hardships and painful lessons. And the current ensemble with a lot of fun.
I'd always expected guitar to be a passing thing in my life. After 4 years, it's still with me and it has only grown. (:
The best thing it'd left me with? The best one-of-a-kind friend ever.!
Happy Birthday Pinglynn Neo, my bestest best bud. In everything <3
One of the biggest sigh let out last year (followed by buckets of tears) was probably SYF. Maybe we were complacent, thought that Gold was within our reach. Suddenly, I've arrived, rather late, at a new revelation. Too silly to play blame games now and find fault with anything possible. We were probably ill-disciplined. We probably didn't have excellent leadership. We probably had the wrong attitudes. At the end of the day, each SYF proved to be a significant part of my life, where I see growth. Not only in others but myself mainly. (Who could actually make the best tempered guy chase her out of practice?) I don't fancy the way I always have to experience something in this seriousness to learn.
Sorry Moon!
I was childish, I was stubborn. So full of myself just because of one successful SYF. Still, I went on to disappoint my conductor with every single guitar practice I skipped in VJ.
All these are etched in my heart as regrets, no doubt. Ones I previously wanted very much to undo. But then again, I appreciate every single on of these regrets. Because of it, I want to achieve more. What has really touched me the most was the friendships I'd forged in each ensemble I've played it. 05 Syf with fond memories and spirit that I never let go off. 07 with tears of hardships and painful lessons. And the current ensemble with a lot of fun.
I'd always expected guitar to be a passing thing in my life. After 4 years, it's still with me and it has only grown. (:
The best thing it'd left me with? The best one-of-a-kind friend ever.!
Happy Birthday Pinglynn Neo, my bestest best bud. In everything <3