There's a reason why people don't stay who they are

Friday, April 27

7 Pointer *gasp gasp gasp* JianAn's trademark
RJC -huh, you can meh?

New Goals, no longer TJC. I'm pursuing after MrG at RJC.

That's why Im working so hard for MYEs
That's why I want to have L1R5 10 for MYEs
That's why Im out of my pathetic mind
That's why Im scared out of my guts
That's why I want to prove my worth
That's why I love A/E(maths+hist)

I think this is most likely the most ambitious thing Ive hoped to achieve(apart form SYF). Adam K(h)oo (?)'s motivational speech has revved up my_____. Believe you can, Believe you can, Believe you can. People are there to put you down, to tell you why you can't in life just because they can't either. Ive seen this rivalry thing on around lately. Ok, selfcenteredness isn't a crime but you're gonna ruin someone just because you make them lose faith.

Edgaurdo is no more on Survivor.

But I'll watch it all the same.

Sunday, April 22

TMR
MYEs
2.4km Run

YTD
East Coast park
RollerBlading/falling/screaming/shouting/cursing
DDR(?)
Billard&Pool

DBF

Tampinese ikea

Its an alien with feelers

Unit event at RC
Chocolate popping

TDA

SYF

ADBF

RJC exchange

Some random day of practice when it poured.

I'll never see the school from the Innosphere this way again

I'll never see blood brothers like that again

I'll never see pinglynn at my house with a guitar at 2am again

I'll never see 17 people squashed in Swenson's again

I'll never see us waiting anxiously together again

I'll never see us tear and cheer again

I'll never see another bunch of people like them again

And SYF is a heartbreaker not because of the big fat S word, but because it pulled us together only to mark the end of the journey for us. I wished and hoped to end it with a bang. Perhaps this was a better solution. No regrets, no apologies. Maybe even no disappointment. When your essay has passed the conflict, the climax, the falling action and hit the solution, it's probably time to let go and write another one. No matter how beautifully you had woven that story with your heart and tears, you've just got to leave it in your library of other forsaken essays, waiting for time to rob you of it. That's why you can't hold on to the past either, society condems it in its mad rush to out do each other. So what can we hang on to?

Friday, April 20

Why I love my guitar lovies.

Nigel and Kevin
They are sec1s for goodness sake! The amount of effort and practice they put in is edvident. From knowing close to nothing and not daring to play, they are so so so confident players now. Im proud of Nigel playing so loudly on that day, so steadily. Im proud of Kevin who cried(over his hair) minutes before going in to pull it off. Although the whole I can play well thing came pretty late but Pinglynn likes to say, Late is better than never.

LiMay SiMin Joanna
I don't think we saw eye to eye in the beginning but as time goes by, I see that SiMin is a responsible leader, LiMay is easy going, Joanna is pretty lame! Oh man, I was damn shocked when she said the far east thing. So unexpected. One Shen Song is enough! Since the CJC exchange, they've really bucked up loads and was so neat in the end. Im proud of you guys, be proud too, it wasn't easy, you know it.

Sharmaine Sheldon Yew Weng
The quiet edge to the group. Golden boy, ice princess all did great with the movement and the 1000watt smiles! Sheldon is hardworking! He ended up being able to play better than Yew Weng who was supposed to teach him. Heheh. Yew Weng is getting funnier!

Kelly Ngai Ying Dawn
Thanks Kelly for being frank, with the make up and the coooooooooooooold jokes too!
Dawn really shocked me during one practice with her runs, I see you're hardworking really.
Nagi Ying too, you two joined us later but managed to play so well. You guys are so hardworking it rocks! I especially love NgaiYing(my section de orh!) picture chocolate coated caramel with frosting on top. She sweeter than that. When I saw her message I totally melted. Although I didnt reply but Im keeping that msg ok!

Camy Emily
From when your confidence was low and you played softly or being a guitar kisser to now I can see your faces hear your playing see you having fun, I feel secured leaving you guys to take over when we all go away. No complains, no procrastination, just whole hearted hardwork. This attitude, this spirit, keep with you alright!

Meryl Cherie Fion
First of all, Thanks to Fion for wearing your bra! Hee. You'll be taking over very soon so stop playing and be more serious already! I trust that you can do it! Meryl Ang is some naggy old woman, she is the most concerned for the guitar group apart for the seniors! I remember how she panicked when Shirley and Monkey boy went missing for some time and how she really did all she can to pay and she is well, the pillar of section1. Cherie is a very devoted person, I can see her wanting to help and eagerness that tine at Tampines.

Shirley MingEn MeiZhen
Well, they went missing for quite a period of time but when they came back, the songs are still in their head and their fingers. Its a really remarkable feat for getting on track within a few weeks. Im really touched/happy/glad/relieved when they came back and participating so actively.

ShenSong*&^%$#@! Yang Rong
What a section leader ! -grits teeth- Do your job la please! Towards the end he did do his job and not a bad one. haha, I had wanted to say you matured but due to the lamelamelamelamelame jokes, I decided against it. Yang Rong's attitude is a killer/headache but nonetheless, he listens to what you have to say and changes.

ALL MY SEXY SEC4 GUITARISTS
Its been a long journey for all. Belinda excelled so much in leading the group and she really really dotes on us. WanQi was a loving leader and one that helped her group alot alot. Nadine is so generous and Pinglynn and Esther is my Dynamic trio!

I think this has beem a whole difference experience from 2years ago. Im satisfied beyond words that its this gang of people that I went with. What Ive written here pales in comparison to what I really want to say, but its getting longer and im getting tired and old): So I enjoyed my short ten minutes like it was a mark to the end of my CCHMS guitar days. Remember we are all performers who love what they do. And I do CHUNG CHENG HIGH GUITAR CLUB. Bring this experience with you and two years later I really want to see Gold regardless of honours. Pass down this spirit this enthusiasm. For Sec4s, its the end of another chapter, beginning of another song. Take care, my lovies :D

Saturday, April 14

SMASHING BOUNDARIES @ KR AND HERE

"Sec2s, now sec4s have moved on to be anchors of the group."

"Heheh, I remember"

"They were small but they had character."

Don't be afraid

"Where's your stamping slipper?"

Hello, is it me you're looking for

"This is that last time."

"Hey juniors, have fun."

"She come then so noisy"

GungHo

"They got gold but yawl got gold too."

We got Gold too

When it comes to reminiscing it always comes together like a floodgate bursting open. Perhaps crying is a sign of weakness, but have you ever seen it as traces of humanity? The thing that makes us complex not the mortal shell that your spirit resides in. It's the emotions, the ability to feel, to touch and be touched, to laugh and cry. Sometimes people say we hold on to the past too much. The fast paced society says move on move on. I say if you don't hold on to the past then what are you going to hold on to? They say the future is in your hands, but is it? Things that came and passed are things you can safe keep. Things that are yet to come are things that you are just groping around for. If I were to blog a list of "I miss"-es, I don't know where I'll end. Things that I worked hard for and acheieved are what I'll miss. Things that are yet to come are things that I can can only hope to wish for.

I feel the my blood pumping. I feel the music pushing my feet. I hear the chairs creeking. I know you're watching us since 2years ago, and we were missing you since.

Labels: Nostalgia

Sunday, April 8

Things are not the same anymore..

Unfamiliar faces glared at me as I walked past them. I scanned the seats in search of something that I could relate to. The chairs, the tables sat quitely as if silently hoping that no one sits on them agian. I knew those chairs but not the people seated on them. I felt like a sharp edge in a circle and it developed as I drew away from the ring where everyone held hands with robotic smiles and fervid enthusiasm.

Things are not the same.

Different posters hung on the same wall, different poeple held the same microphones, different bodies sat on the same chairs. Perhaps it was a small mercy that I could regconise these things that would never open their mouths to talk to me even if they remembered me. Familiar melody boomed form the speakers but it failed to make me feel the same.

Things are not the same.

The same song came on, same singer. Different impact. It wasn't the atmosphere which changed, it was my heart condition. Everything was the same, but I missed out on the process in which it grew. And when I decide to come back, I felt that I was left behind when it was me who didn't bother to keep up. I squirm, I run, I turn, I escape, I deny. Then I went to revisit my once undying passion and love, to scour for the fervid enthusiasm that I once possessed. To find solace, to comfort my ddegraded life stained with crimes that I am ashamed to speak of. Im not good enough.

Things are not the same.

If I have taken such a drastic change, how then is it still possible? They said, "you can't buy back time, can't harp on the good old days, can't wish that change will disappear, can't be at the zenith again." Then I can't. You can't.

Things are not the same.
But He was the same.
The same as when things were in their peak.
Why can't I now?

Things are not the same.

That's why I'll try putting in more effort to make it for service.